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But a whimper

Sep. 11th, 2007 | 10:53 pm
Angst: content content

And thus this journal is finished.
It's had a good run and has served me well but it's time to move onward to bigger and better things.
A new log of my thoughts, feelings and general bloggery is available at [info]fisforfailboat .
I would appreciate if you added it.
See you there.

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Something borrowed, something blue

Sep. 7th, 2007 | 02:49 pm
Angst: creative creative
Noise: Worth dying for-Rise Against

I put down the first payment on my tattoo yesterday at Illicit.

What this brings into question for me is whether I should be mentioning this at all. Tattoos, to me at least, are an intensely personal concept, an image decorating your body, of your choice, forever. And yet I find I've been telling plenty of people about my plans regarding ink and so on.

Statistically speaking according to a survey by BMEzine men get tattoos primarily to show others whereas women get them specifically for themselves. As much as I'd like to say I'm not getting one to show it off, I know realistically that I probably am. Perhaps as some sort of means of identifying myself or even fitting in. Who can say for sure?
Whether I interpret this as a good or a bad thing I don't know yet because as I said earlier, this is a personal choice and a personal commitment. Do I do this for myself or for everyone else?

I can certainly attribute the particular decision to begin now to my friends. When you suddenly find that nearly every person you hang out with on a regular basis is now tattooed it becomes a lot easier to contemplate personal modification. When you find most of your peer group are doing similar things then its difficult not to do them yourself. An act of conformity essentially.
As a member of the punk community, hell even the goth community, there's almost an expectation there to modify yourself, to be tattooed.
And I feel myself yielding to this in many ways. Even though my design is nothing like any of the traditional tattoo subject matter that's commonly seen I still view it as something that will garner me the interest of people within the communities I belong to.
Is it their interest or acceptance that I seek or do I simply want a fascinating design permanently emblazoned on my body?
I would say my primary motivation is the design, how it makes me feel and think. The secondary motivation is to differentiate myself from others by doing something suitably radical but within the bounds of common acceptance. Nothing ground breaking as it were, just something interesting.

And yet, even the words I use in my head to justify it to myself speak of external expression rather than personal gratification. I say to myself "I want this design to show my dedication to and fascination with physics". The verb "show" indicating perhaps that this is something I do for reasons beyond my own happiness.

Will this make me happy? I believe it will. I'm happy already so this (provided the design is workable) should only add to my happiness.
I want this tattoo to change my bodily image to one that more appropriately conforms with what I see in my head so in the end, it seems this is more for my own sake than anything else.

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Perhaps, perhaps not

Sep. 5th, 2007 | 08:11 pm
Angst: busy busy
Noise: Ignore the machine-Alien Sex Fiend

I want to start a new blog. I'm sick of this one. It's rare that I post anything of interest or use here and that frustrates me. I'd like a medium to start afresh and limit myself to information and opinion of interest, "up my game" as it were. I have a lot of things I want to say but this simply doesn't seem like the appropriate place to say them.

So the question stands, do I create a new LJ to keep in contact with the people on here or do I go to an alternate medium like Blogger? I could use blogger with my google account etc etc.
What do others use? What do people recommend? I'd like something with a degree of customization. Hell, the ability to hook google-ads into it would be nice also. I don't expect many people to read or click through but perhaps I could drag a few dollars out of it.

Of course then you've got to examine the ethics of having advertising and using a blog as a money making medium rather than simply a creative output. See, thats one of the things I don't feel like this is the appropriate place for since this is basically just documentation of my day to day routine. Tedious really.

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The blood

Aug. 16th, 2007 | 05:22 pm
Noise: Ministry-NWO

Tuesday 14th.
The Cure.

Where to begin? At the beginning I suppose would be logical.

I arrived at the stadium at approximately 6.50, right on doors open. Wandered in and found a couch to wait on while I waited for the doors to open for the main seating. I was surprised how easy it was to get in and how little hassle.

Once the doors opened I walked in and found my seat, approximately 15 metres from the stage, directly in line with the front edge. So I was sitting looking side on, no more than 20 metres from Smith himself when he came on. 
The front section, standing area I mean, was packed to the gills. I saw a few people I know fighting their way to the front; that's how close I was, I could make out their faces without problems.

So, the roadies are wandering around and checking guitars etc. The stage setup is pretty standard, amps, drums in the middle and pedalboards with Smith's mic in the middle of the stage.
Hanging from the ceiling was a large semicircular lighting rig with moving heads, strobes and hanging bulbs on it. They were arranged to follow the curve of the lighting rig. 
Behind that were four large projection boards that could be covered and uncovered.
Just before The Cure came on the lights were dimmed and the stage was lit with a purple wash.

On comes Robert and the boys. Standard baggy pants, big shoes and so on.
The set begins;
open, fascination street, alt.end, the blood, the walk, the end of the world, lovesong, pictures of you, lullaby, hot hot hot, push, in between days, friday i'm in love, just like heaven, if only tonight we could sleep, the kiss, shake dog shake, never enough, from the edge of the deep green sea, wrong number, one hundred years, shiver and shake, end,
E1: plainsong, disintegration, faith,
E2: three imaginary boys, fire in cairo, boys don't cry, jumping someone else'e train, grinding halt, 10.15 saturday night, killing an arab,
E3: a forest

All throughout this there's an awesome light show going on and wicked visuals on the backboards.

Sound was a bit average, not a particularly good mix but everything was audible so who cares?

Highlights for me were A Forest, The Blood, Wrong Number, One Hundred Years and Jumping Someone Else's Train.

Yeah, that's all. I spent more time reviewing my seat than the band. So what?

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Tuesday I'm in love...

Aug. 15th, 2007 | 12:39 am

The Cure were brilliant. More details on this tomorrow.

My nokia 6235 phone has stopped working since it ran out of battery and I used someone else's battery in it briefly. I changed back, made sure everything was connected in properly. Once I arrived back I tried to charge it... and nothing happens, tried different sockets and so on but not a different charger as yet. The support documentation is useless. Any clue what this could be?

EDIT: Tried a different charger, no change. Also connected it up to the computer and nothing happens there either. Next step I suppose is to try another battery.

I also need a haircut but can't afford one. Does anyone want to give me one or recommend where I can one for free?

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The sum of all your fears

Aug. 5th, 2007 | 01:08 pm
Angst: awake awake
Noise: Freedom-Scatha

Further research indicates that I'm going to have to do a fucking honours year if I want to get into the Masters program at UBC. While this isn't really all that annoying it does add another year to my program. Still, I'll be fucking set for life and seriously stoked once I complete the whole ordeal. All I need to do is get decent marks this semester and then good marks next year. Then awesome marks in Honours.
Time to start investigating Honours at Auckland I guess!
Hopefully I'll be able to get some sort of scholarship next year and the year after because I'm concerned that working is affecting my performance.
Really, all of these things give me motivation to succeed so I guess there's not too much harm there. On top of that is the fact that once I have Masters or, worse yet, a PHD I will be in a position to pursue a career I suspect I'll really enjoy. Ok cool.
Anyone got any advice they feel the need to share?

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Goddamnit.

Aug. 4th, 2007 | 01:53 pm
Noise: Junk food diet-Bones Brigade

I signed up to Auckland public library last month specifically so I could read Preacher by Garth Ennis. I've currently read collected issues 1 and 2.
It turns out that they have every issue somewhere in the system... every issue except issue 3. What. The. Fuck.

This is fucking frustrating. There's nothing worse in reading when you can't find out what's happened to the characters you're reading about.

So, can anyone lend me issue 3 or recommend me a resource for downloading comics?

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Die!!!

Aug. 2nd, 2007 | 07:02 pm
Noise: Easy tiger-Every Time I Die


Thank you Tommy.

I brought myself a Samsung YP-K3, 2 gig of storage, 25hours battery life and a decent size OLED screen. We shall see how it goes shortly.

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Reviews?

Aug. 1st, 2007 | 12:35 pm

Anyone owned or used a creative zen micro? I'm thinking about buying a 5gig one tomorrow. Reviews on Cnet seem pretty decent.
Your thoughts please.

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Blind me with science

Jul. 19th, 2007 | 11:01 pm
Noise: She's in parties-Bauhaus

I watched a 20/20 documentary this evening on Tourette syndrome and current treatment for it. I won't go into how rubbish some of the explanations were. However it has definitely put some fuel into my plan of getting at least a Masters in psychology, I think I'd like to help people like that.

Also, does anyone know the scientific name of the trails seen in this image?
 
I know they're caused by electrons being shot through a liquid but wikipedia isn't helping whatsoever. Links to multiple images would be muchly appreciated.

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Rapcat knows where it's at.

Jul. 19th, 2007 | 08:51 pm
Noise: Gredel-Crucify

I'm chewing on big red which I found in a dairy on Symonds st. God this stuff brings back the memories. Most requested present in high school. Everyone wanted you to bring it back if you went to the states.
Reminds me of the first day I was in LA, scouting convenience stores to get some and then buying a red LA baseball hat ala Fred Durst. Man I was cool...
The smell evokes the strongest memories. I wonder why that is?
And now, RAPCAT.

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Waaaheey dickead: Part 2

Jul. 19th, 2007 | 09:52 am
Angst: apathetic apathetic
Noise: ザクロ-Dir En Grey

This is part 2 in my continuing series on the stupid things university students do.

Conversations. Not regular conversations though, no. These conversations take place in groups of at least 3 in the place where they're most likely to cause traffic obstruction. Namely in doorways, the top of stairs and generally anywhere that people will be trying to get through.
You'd think people would realise that when the door is only 1m wide and yet is the primary access way out of the main building that blocking it might cause some difficulty.
However you have to consider that some of these people may be engineers or commerce students. When you think about it that way it's hard to judge them too harshly... they're barely sentient as it is.
The rest of them have no excuse though.

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(no subject)

Jul. 15th, 2007 | 03:50 am

Anyone who missed Planet Hardcore should be gutted. Raves are retarded fun as. I think I'm gonna call the labour department or something about the fact they wouldn't give me free water though. That's illegal. Pricks.
Aside from that, awesome.

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Woah fuck!

Jul. 13th, 2007 | 06:15 pm
Noise: Track 5-Planet Hardcore Sampler

Anyone who's going to Planet Hardcore on Saturday night should listen to track 5 of the sample CD while viewing this website.
Fuuuuuuckin yeeeah

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(no subject)

Jul. 12th, 2007 | 08:30 pm
Angst: tired tired
Noise: Orakulum-Sunn 0)))

Holy Christ... I just sat through the entire 47 minutes of HeliO)))Sophist by Sunn 0))). Admittedly it wasn't nearly as loud as it should have been but my my, what a "song".
Doom of various kinds has really been growing on me lately. My current favourites are Electric Wizard, Boris, Down and My Dying Bride.

I should have signed up to DJ at goth vs industrial. Aside from the fact I was out of town I think I could have done an awesome industrial set. Not one track by N.U.T.E., The Mercy Cage, Angelspit, Katscan or Laibach... Da fuk yo?

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Drilling deeper

May. 21st, 2007 | 11:05 pm
Angst: accomplished accomplished
Noise: 37mm-AFI

I feel like I've accomplished something today. I haven't but that's not going to stop me feeling good about myself.

Dentists appointment tomorrow morning. If you don't see me online tomorrow evening send a search part.

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(no subject)

May. 20th, 2007 | 12:46 pm
Noise: Room the echoes-Nullity

I know most of you have seen this plenty already but there are a few more people who need to see this;

'she's lost: an underground new zealand music recovery expedition' is a a free downloadable virtual compilation CD featuring some of new zealand's finest dark-alt/industrial/electro/experimental artists recording versions of their favourite kiwi songs. More info on each of these tracks, including the releases on which they originally appeared, is available here. Be sure to check out the original artists behind these songs, on i-tunes, your local record store, live...support New Zealand music however you can. Also, don't miss reading the story behind this record here. It's a blinder. Spread the word, tell a friend...

She's Lost: An Underground New Zealand Music Recovery Expedition

she's lost


So, get to it! If you have any interest in NZ music, darker music, electronic music or anything similar then download this album!

Also, I think Expecting to fly as covered by The Mercy Cage is my favourite song EVAR. Seriously.

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Oh word.

May. 8th, 2007 | 11:54 pm
Angst: excited excited
Noise: Hymn 01-The Mercy Cage

Just thought I'd let people know that "A Scanner Darkly" is now in cinemas.
I saw this at the last film festival earlier this year and I can safely say it's one of my favourite films now.
A very accurate rendition of the book it was based on and most definitely worth the money regardless of which day you see it on.
I can recommend this movie to anyone who likes scifi or any of Phillip K Dick's work.

Oh and for the rest of the world, this film is available on DVD.

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Yayuh

May. 6th, 2007 | 02:13 am
Angst: happy happy
Noise: Nothing's working-Error

I went out tonight with Nick, Sarah, Nat and Chris.
Lets be brutally honest here guys. My friends are better than your friends. My friends care enough to keep me company all night but also feed me booze and make sure I get home ok. Are your friends as cool as mine?
I just spent about $60 on AFI merch. Shirt thermal. w00t.
Yeah, I've been drinking but it was hella fun and I'm better mates with my friends now so it's wicked as.
Years of drunk posting has made me heroic as. Fuck, I rule at drunk posting.

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Fuck you fundie scum, go die.

May. 5th, 2007 | 05:18 pm
location: Rantville.
Angst: angry angry
Noise: Fight War, Not Wars-Crass

I would like to bring your attention; http://www.right-to-life.org/
"NZ Issues that concern us include Abortion Euthanasia Living Wills Assisted Suicide Fetal Tissue and Embryonic Stem Cell Research Cloning and other Bio-Ethical Issues Personhood Sex Education and the liberalising of Prostitution in New Zealand"

Despite the incredibly awful formatting of this website, which is would be oh so easy for me to bash, this place is a serious threat to rational thinking in New Zealand. Let me explain why; They are promoting incredibly short sighted, closed minded and downright dangerous ideas.
How is sex education EVER a bad idea? Are children and teenagers to be kept in the dark about the functioning of their own bodies? God help us if the teens ever find out that sex is neither dirty nor wrong... Seriously though, how does sex education ever damage a person? Educating them as to what is safe and what isn't is what prevents unplanned pregnancies and STDs. Without sex education kids are only going to do risky things that they would otherwise know better than.
Prostitution? While I don't like the fact that some people are forced into this trade by circumstance there are no doubt people out there who do it by choice. Who are we to say that's wrong? Placing this profession under regulation, keeping brothels away from schools (god forbid the children learn about sex) and so on is most certainly a good idea. Really, by making it such that prostitution is no longer illegal and is at least partially regulated the government has done anything but liberalised it.
I don't even feel the need to address the other "issues" they bring up because they're so done to death it's not even funny.

Further illustrating that these people are as inbred as a bakery;
Labour and National combine to criminalise the right of NZ parents to discipline their own children. A light smack will still be a criminal offence. Democracy?
Clearly the authors of this stinking shit heap of a site haven't actually read the bill. A light smack is recognized as an inconsequential force. As such the police have no mandate to investigate it as it is a waste of police time. Perhaps these people are administering more than an inconsequential force? If you have nothing to hide you have nothing to fear is the old saying that comes to mind.
The government are removing the ambiguities from the law so that, just as you cannot beat an adult, you can no longer beat a child and hide behind the phrasing "reasonable" force. This obviously makes them undemocratic.

The danger is that these people have money enough to put billboards up outside my house. How does a cause so blind, so ignorant of the facts garner enough money to put up new posters month after month? They're careful not to associate themselves with any churches but it's reasonably obvious who's funding them given the subject matter.
It's taken every bone of restraint I have not to tear the fucking things down. As much as I hate what they have to say I know that I am a better person by not taking out my anger in a physical fashion on their propaganda... yet.

If you'd like to contact these people, their email address is freely available at the bottom of the page. rtl@right-to-life.org


EDIT: They openly link to anti-gay propaganda as well. Feel free to send abusive emails.

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